Today I was talking to a foreign acquaintance who came for a day of meeting. We knew his connecting flight was cancelled and even though he took another one and then took a 1 or 2 hour taxi to the airport, he inevitably missed his main flight and was stranded in the airport for a number of hours. When we asked him about it, he mentioned the flight was ok, just for a small hiccup though I sensed his expressions betrayed his true emotions.
This brought memories of my stay almost ten years ago in San Diego. I had a local flatmate who always looked happy to others. She seemed to have many friends and whenever people asked her how she was, she would say great... etc. In actual fact she was not feeling great and quite a few times I could hear her crying. She felt so lonely. Initially I thought it was strange considering the number of people showing concern for her.
Later I learnt it was just a 2nd nature for people to greet each other "Hi, How are you?". I also learnt that often before there was a chance to reply, the person who asked the question would have walked away. In addition, people would be shocked more than concerned when you replied other than "great, fine etc". "How are you" is really more of a greeting than a sincere concern to know how is the person. Often people answered you just in a way you expect the answer to be as we know the questioners (or rather greeters) do not really mean to ask how you are doing.
I guess "How are you?" was not meant to be in this way though it is now likely quite rooted in its way. In a way I feel it alienated people more. There will probably be more smiles in the world if more people ask them in the good old fashioned way where it is sincerely meant as a question. Somehow, I think I still prefer the more subtle oriental way of greeting --- "Have you eaten?". :) A glutton indeed haha
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